Impatience and the Art of Gun Jumping

     I'm good at jumping things. I jump to conclusions. I jump through hoops. In 8th grade I won 4th

place in the long jump on track and field day at school. But the thing I'm best at is jumping the gun. Which is kind of what I did with the announcement I made yesterday regarding the release of Tales of Fort Thomas. I know, I know, it's a total dick move. But I think once I explain myself, you'll understand.

    

When I create anything I want to get it out to the masses as soon as humanly possible. I have no patience. I just get my book/art/etc... out there and let the universe do with it what it pleases. I did that with Paige's Story. No, honestly, I really did. I should have held on it to for a few more months, scoured the manuscript again, and beefed up my marketing strategy. But I didn't. Now, I had a great release for Paige's Story. Sales are still steady years down the road and that's pretty okay for a self published gal such as myself. Now, to my defense, I had no fucking clue what I was doing when I published Paige's Story, so all things considered, I think I did okay.

    This time it's different. This time I know what I'm doing. I know more about marketing. I know more

about publishing, and editing, and all that. But, most importantly, I know the importance of taking my time, timing things correctly, and how to make sales count. 

    I hadn't really intended on doing an audiobook release of Tales of Fort Thomas, but after I wrote the short story 'Terms and Conditions', I just knew I couldn't deny the world the opportunity to hear Phil Thron's take on Fer after he loses his ability to swear.

    That's right. You guessed it. Phil's back and he's reading my next book! It's official! I'm excited! Are you excited? Because I'm excited! That's why I'm postponing my launch. I want to be able to give you, my readers, followers, and friends, the opportunity to experience my next book the way you want-- be it paperback, e-book, or audiobook-- from day one. I don't have a specific date yet, but I will certainly keep everyone posted once dates become clearer. ...and this time I swear I won't jump the gun.  

In the meantime, don't lose heart, there's still going to be plenty to look forward to in the upcoming months. Ben and I are working on new designs for stickers, t-shirts, and other merchandise for when we re-open the Fort Thomas PX. There will be give aways for free e-books and audiobooks on the horizon. And, of course, regular updates and progress reports from yours truly. 

Trying To Write In All the Wrong Head Space

 Scene: It's eight o'clock and time for my kids to go to bed. They turn off their video games and You Tubes as though they were on death row and it was time for them to make the long walk. They go to the
bathroom and brush their teeth and after I confirm for the five millionth time that my son is actually using toothpaste (what the hell is it with little boys and not wanting to do shit like this?) we get waters, my daughter takes her pill (chronic UTIs for the win... do people still say that? For the win? They don't, do they? I bet they don't.)

    After pills and waters, it's story time. But not yet, because everyone has to find their blankies, Cat-titos, and Corgos. Now, with stuffed animals and blankets and gathered and it's time for a story. We're reading
Matilda right now. We read a chapter... with frequent commentary from both kids on how Matilda's parents are garbage and how they are so confused as to why Miss. Trunchbull would work in a school if she hates kids so much. We make it through a chapter and of course both kids are all, "Noooooo! One more chapter!" Depending on the length of the next chapter I may or may not oblige. 

    After stories there are tuck ins, hugs, and if you're my daughter, a big long conversation about death, how one goes about getting their own apartment, and how she plans to never get married and just live with her pet beagle named Rosie. ... my daughter is six. 

    So at this point it's been an hour since bedtime began and now I have to go downstairs, sit in front of my computer and put myself in the headspace of a traumatized fifteen-year-old and her sentient android parent. 

    This is hard.

    This is hard because I worked a shift at the café that was utter pandemonium, I ran my ass off, made a nice chunk of change, came home, tided the house, got the kids their showers and then headlined the three ring circus that is bedtime. I am tired. I am tired and my mind is all, "Can I please just watch Bob's Burgers and eat a bowl full of Dot's pretzels?" But I don't. I sit down and open my computer and a have at it.  And sometimes, like tonight, good stuff happens. I get right into the correct headspace and
everything flows. Other nights I get nothing. 

    The last few nights I wasn't able to get anything really good down. I couldn't loosen my brain up enough. I've had a long week. It's nice out so that means the café has been super busy. That's not a complaint. The fact that we're starting to bounce back to normal, pre-'rona business is great. It just means I'm tired as fuck at the end of the day. Tonight I was just the right amount of tired, and focused, and with the aid of a glass of bourbon my brain was able to get some good stuff down. 

   Hopefully I'll be able to get some more quality work done tomorrow and wrap this story up. Once it's done that means it's time to start editing and putting Tales together. 

    I'm looking forward to that. 

    In the meantime, have an old drawing from 2011 of Paige, Anji, and Fer.